New Melvis Performances Announced!!!!

Well, the time has come for the big time. It's a bittersweet moment, because so many of us have come to rely on the heart-stopping shows that Mel puts on at the bowling alley for free. It's great tham Mel will finally be making some money from his refined talent, but it means us freeloaders need to start putting up the dough.

It basically breaks down like this:

Frankie will continue to run his normal Karaoke show in the West Bar as he normally does. But, for those who want to see the Melvis, you'll have to journey into the seldom-used East Bar (located by the pro shop).

I did have a chance to talk to the management about this interesting move:

Regis: "So why the change to put Melvis in the East Bar?"
*Fritz: "After lengthy talks with the Melvis Estate, we decided to make the change and meet Mel's demands. When you have a talent like his coming into your business, you'll do whatever it takes to keep him around."

R: "But why the East Bar?"
F: "The Melvis Estate was adamant about using a more intimate setting. While we certainly believe that Mel could easily fill the West Bar several nights a week, we had to bow to artist demands."

R: "How do you see this change affecting the regular bargoer at the FHL?"
F: "Well, it's going to be difficult for those who want an audience with Melvis. The max capacity of the East Bar is 50 seated, and Mel doesn't want any standing room only tickets sold. We will only be selling same-day performance tickets, so we expect the ticket rush to begin as soon as we open our doors Saturday morning. We have strict orders to our bartenders and employees to not sell tickets in advance, even to VIPs.

R: "What about special promotions for groups like the Fan Club?"
F: "We have no plans to offer any specials on ticket sales at this point in time."

R: "You made it a point to keep Karaoke going even though Melvis will no longer be singing in the West Bar."
F: "Yes, although we expect Karaoke nights to be far diminished in attendance. It will basically be the people who were unable to secure tickets for the Melvis Performance. We wil be analyzing different options when we see the Karaoke numbers. I fully expect to remove Karaoke altogether by summer. Without Melvis, it's really going to have less appeal for the average patron."

R: "Any comment on the rumors that the show will include a topless Vegas-style revue?"
F: "We are not releasing any information about the show, and that's all I will say."

R: "Thanks for your time."

Management was kind enough to release this promotional flyer that they will be using to hype the Melvis show (right-click and view in new window to see detail). I will see if I can get some comment from Melvis, but I'm sure he will be very tight-lipped about it, maybe even pretending he doesn't know what I'm talking about.

*Name changed due to legal reasons